I Didn't Want to be a Christian

From what I’d seen, being a Christian looked like a restricting life.

When I first got saved, I was maybe in 7th grade and I gave my life to Jesus at a First Baptist Church. It was a sincere move from my heart, but I didn’t actually start living like a Christian until later because it didn't look enticing at all.

So, what caused the change?

Moving to a new town.

When I was a junior in high school, I moved to a new town with my mom. We started going to a non-denominational church and I decided to go check out the youth group instead of going to Sunday service.

They were so much fun! I didn’t even know them, but they were welcoming and friendly. After a couple of times attending, I remember looking at them from across the room and thinking, “I want what they have.”

They made being a Christian not look mundane. It was a different kind of fun – not hollow, but full of joy and craziness and serving and friendships.

That’s when the change happened. God changed my heart like He said He would in Ezekiel 36:26 {I challenge you to grab your Bible and read this verse right quick}.

As for the rest of the story…

We were only in that town for a year and then we moved back, and I remember moving back with a whole new perspective and a whole new focus. I loved it. I didn’t have that same bundle of godly friendships or a home church when I moved back, but those youth group friends were still close – and 6-8 of them even made the road trip to attend my high school graduation.

This isn’t to say I didn’t fall off the wagon in my walk with God – because I did. In late college, I began living crazy again. I felt like I’d been so solid for so long that I should start “letting loose” again.

It wasn’t worth it. I did that for about a year and then got my act together. I’m not sure what prompted the positive change the second time, but I knew right from wrong, and I knew who I was meant to be, and I knew who Jesus was in my life.

After college, I decided to get baptized. I intentionally waited because it's a "public profession of faith", and I didn't want to "announce" that I was a Christian if I knew I wasn't ready to walk the walk. (I was baptized as a baby because we attended a Catholic church, but I know that that wasn’t my choice.)

*By the way - No, you don't wait until you're ready to 'walk the walk' before you get baptized. That was just something I had put in my own head.

But I felt like I was finally at that point in my life where I could confidently and publicly profess my faith and know that I wouldn’t live a blatantly hypocritical lifestyle.

And now, being a Christian is way better than I imagined it would be.

As Joyce Meyer says, "I'm still not where I want to be, but thank God, I'm not where I used to be."

I encourage you to give God a chance if you haven't yet.

He really does change everything - even your desires. Don't wait to be 'good enough' to reach out to Him. He's so holy that we'll never be good enough.

Just reach out to Him as you are, in all your mess, right now.

He's always ready to receive you. Always.

Pray and push,
Venus

If you decide that you want God in your life, here's a simple prayer you can say quietly or out loud:

Dear God, I'm a sinner. I’m sorry for my sin; please forgive me.

I believe Jesus Christ is Your Son and that He died for my sins and You raised Him to life.

I want to invite Him into my heart to take control of my life.

In Jesus’ name I pray, Amen.

(No pressure, but if you do say this prayer, I'd love to know so you're not stuck with the thought of, "Okaaaaay, what now?")